Friday, January 01, 2010

One Little Word

Ali Edwards started a challenge a few years back, that involved picking what she calls "one little word" and making that the focus of your year. Last year my word started out as nurture and ended up as revive. The year before it was pause. I think I did much better last year than the year before.. but I really want to do even better this year. I've been struggling with my word this year. I reviewed the list of people's chosen words for last year and nothing jumped out at me. I thought about what I wanted out of this year, but nothing was screaming "use me!" until today. I was un-decorating the last tree, and suddenly I knew what I wanted my word to be.

Balance. I googled the word to see what I could find out there on the web. Miriam Webster gives as one of it's definitions for balance: stability produced by even distribution of weight on each side of the vertical axis. Stability.. I can use some of that. Distribution of (fill in anything going on in my life here).. I can use some of that also. WebMD has a Balance Center as one of it's features of it's webpage. One of it's feature articles right now is about finding peace, and the other about simplifying your life. Depending on what definition you use, gives these synonyms for balance; evenness, harmony, stability, steadfastness, readjust, harmony.

I think I hear the Hallelujah Chorus going off in my head. Some part of my silly brain, thought that when the kids got older things would slow down and become a little more normal and calm. I don't know why I had this delusion, but it got me through the toddler years, the pre-school years and all of elementary school, so I guess it was a good thing. Now that I have one in HS and one in Middle School, I've never been more busy in my entire life. Between school events and sports and band stuff and dances it just never seems to end. On top of that I have my town positions, Steel Drums, a full time job, too many hobbies and a house to take care of. Don't get me wrong for one minute. I am grateful beyond measure for ALL of these things. I just feel a little strung out. Pulled in a million directions.

My focus for this year, is to find a balance between it all. I need to look hard at how I'm spending my time, and do a better job of it. I need to get back into a better sleep pattern like at the beginning of this school year, and I need to force myself out to go running even when I'm too tired and don't feel like it. I can feel the physical effects of not doing either of these things and it's wearing me down. Today, and over the next week I plan on taking a hard look at my life and what's going on, and how I can better manage it all and come up with a list of ways to make it work better. Ways to slow down a little. Ways to enjoy my kids before they are all grown up and gone. Ways to have the time I spend with The Boy be more focused on 'us' and not just the two of us in the same room doing our own thing. A way to find Balance.

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