L.M. Montgomery wrote "October was a beautiful month at Green Gables, when the birches in the hollow turned as golden as sunshine and the maples behind the orchard were royal crimson and the wild cherry trees along the lane put on the loveliest shades of dark red and bronzy green, while the fields sunned themselves in the aftermaths. Anne reveled in the world of color about her..."I'm so glad I live in a world where they are Octobers. It would be terrible if we just skipped from September to November, wouldn't it?..."
Aside from loving Anne of Green Gables, I love the colors of fall. I love the different shades of green, and deep orange and crimson red and royal purple and brown are the colors that I am drawn to when I make my wardrobe choices, if I'm not choosing black or grey. I feel like October is the month that fall really shines. Here in NH we call it "peak season" and it's the time when the leaves are their most glorious colors and you can drive through the state and admire the changing foliage from north to south through the month.
October is also a month that I struggle with. In school it's the month that we spend weeks doing out mandatory state testing. It's a month that ties to dark memories of my past. The funny thing about that, is that there should be so many months that tie to dark memories of my past, but October was a pivotal month, and therefore has a special place tied up in my memories. You'd think after so many years of your life, your could let go of things from your past. That eventually you move on and are done with them. Yet every year when October rolls around I am haunted by some of the same dreams, and the same dark ghosts.
I often wonder if I could go back, if I could change any of it, would I? Would I trade it all in, give it all up, for a different experience? I wouldn't be the same strong person that I am today. As hard as it's been and as rough of a road that I've had to travel, would I change any of it? I don't know. I really don't know.