Saturday, February 12, 2011

Love Finds You

Long time readers of my blog will know that I am not a huge fan of Valentine's Day. I've always operated under the theory that it's a Halmark holiday, created to boot sales of cards and gifts and candy in the middle of a winter slump. The holidays are over, winter is long, and what can we do to get people spending? With this attitude, I've taken to not celebrating the day at all. After all, I believe in showing my love on my terms, not on a day that the calendar says I should.

It might surprise you then, to hear that I've had a change of heart (har-har). It's not that I feel any different about the  commercialism of the day,  it's that I have a new appreciation for the idea behind it. Without love, what do we have? I watched a chick-flicky kind of movie with my daughter late last month, which featured a young couple, in the throes of new love, and it caused me to think about how relationships change over time. How I love The Boy™, stronger, and more deeply now than I did 17 years ago, but how different our love was then, and how different we are. When you are newly in love, your whole focus is that other person, and thinking of how you love them, and showing them. Once you've been married for 15 years, I've found (and maybe this isn't true for everyone else), it's different. Sure, we love each other, and he makes my coffee and I iron his work shirts and we show each other our love in different ways, but it's not with the same kind of focus and passion as when we were newly in love.

So I decided this year, that I'm not celebrating Valentine's Day exactly, I'm celebrating love. I'm using this time between Feb.1-14th, to show  my love. Each day I've left a little gift, or a "coupon" for say, getting out of coming to do errands, or as much X-Box playing as he wants, on his laptop. I have decorated one little area of our dining room. (see prior posts photo). I made a heart wreath with felt, and that little photo-framed "Love" decoration.  I had thought maybe I'd do the whole month.. but I think I'll save that for next year. This is my first year "celebrating" after all. What I've found, that focusing on your love for someone else, for an extended amount of time, really causes you to think about that person, and how much you love them, and why. It also causes you to look at the things they do to show you how they love you, no matter how small they are. It has been a grand discovery, embracing love.

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