Monday, January 16, 2006

Clean Sweep

"Amidst all the crap, there are some things worth holding onto. " ~Gray's Anatomy

This is my year to get rid of the crap. Everyone has baggage that they tote around, knowingly or not. I seem to tow around people. You know..those couple people from your past that you just can't quite be done with. One of my resolutions this year was to finally put to rest somethings from my past. Last night, as I heard this quote on Gray's..I decided it was time.

This morning, I wrote three letters. I have 3 people who I carry with me. Two of them are tied to painful situations in my past. One of them is an old friend. The two letters regarding painful situations weren't all that hard to write. What I didn't realize, was that I have already come to terms with these people. I have forgiven them, and moved on. I am a better, stronger person because of what I went through. I just didn't quite see that.

The old friend was a bit harder. I had thought I had gotten past that. I really did. Due to a surprise clicking incident in the fall.. I realized I hadn't. What I discovered, was that there was never closure. Never a chance to say goodbye and move on. And so I poked around where maybe I shouldn't have.. just to get a glimpse.. wondering how things were and all that. And it was a mistake. Today I put that old friendship to rest. It felt good to get it all out on paper and I felt a big weight lift off of my shoulders.

When I was done with these letters.. I took them into the other room and shredded them. Just that act alone was more healing than I could ever imagine. They each went into their own separate envelopes, and I think they will end up in my BOM. A reminder of how far I've come.

1 comment:

Awesome Abby said...

awesome, beth! maybe i can find some courage from you and do the same thing. thanks for sharing.