A few early year letters

Dear Mother Nature,
Thanks so much for providing us with a gorgeous sunny day today. You rock! We are doing a scientific experiment at school to see if we do in fact live in a gloomy part of the country. We will be tracking gloomy vs sunny days until spring and then chart it and submit our findings. We did a little predicting and it's not looking good in your favor. I hear it will be in the low 50's the end of this week, and then will abruptly plummet into the teens and single digits. How cruel your cold heart is to tease us so. Love the snowy landscapes however, keep up the good work!

Dear Horrible Mother,
I walked by you on Monday as you rushed into school, apparently late for a meeting. I didn't give much thought to your running mini-van, nor the 2 kids that were climbing all over the inside. When I walked by some time later, and noticed your van still running, I thought it a bit odd, but kept on with my work. Then my brain woke up and put 2 and 2 together. You were the woman in the meeting keeping me from my work. You had left your van running for over an hour. With your children INSIDE. What kind of lowlife neglectful person are you? I don't care if the older one was 10. He should've been in class. Not sitting in a van minding his 5 year old brother while your ass sat in a meeting that you were in no rush to get out of even after it was brought to your attention that your van was still running. Yes I ratted you out. Not I don't feel bad. Get an effing life and take better care of your children! The rest of us hire a babysitter when we have important things to attend to. Hell you could've brought him in and I would've played with him, as you were meeting in my room. I hope you are happy with yourself. Bitch.

Dear family member I was worried about,
I am so happy that you are OK. God works in funny ways and I couldn't imagine life without you in it. Continued good thoughts that it will all continue to be "OK." I love you.

Confidential to that boy who stole my heart,
Either way, it will all work out somehow. I love you. If I had known that nothing in our life would ever be easy, I would still marry you all over again.